GROWING PAINS

This year has been so full.

Full of new places, new faces, a new job, new community and new responsibility. It's also been full of growing pains, disappointments and doubts. It's uncomfortable for these two things to coexist, but I think it means growth.

I don't think we always want to grow when we say we do. We ask for change--to be made better--but are discouraged by the first obstacle we face.

I say, "Jesus, give me patience." And yet, I'm frustrated to stay in this season of being single. 

I say, "Jesus, help me be bold." Yet I see things I could speak out against and choose not to because I don't want to deal with the discomfort of confrontation or an awkward situation. 

I say, "Jesus give me kindness & gentness." But I yell at my mom on the phone or toss glares at people not getting out of my way on my commute.

In order to truly grow, in order to become who God is calling me to be, I need to sink into this discomfort. 
I have to wait patiently for the right man to date.
I have to speak out when I see wrong.
I have to be gentle with my mom and kind to the strangers on the bus.

Growth is often going to feel uncomfortable. It's not always pretty. It hurts to learn through experiences--but when growth is what we're asking for, we need to lean into it. And when we lean into this we begin to see some of the small pieces of who Jesus is making us to be.